Nathan Kocmond Eulogy — written by his dad, Jon Kocmond (F3’s The Shore)
Thank you all for coming today and sharing in our love for Nathan. I’m not sure how well I’ll be able to speak to you here, but I want to, so that you may understand where our family is coming from through this ordeal and what meaning Nathan’s death has to us and you. There are several things that have become clear to us during this last week. The first, is that Nathan IS in Heaven with God. He has been saved from his anguish here on earth, and is at peace with our Lord. God has spoken directly to us in several ways over the last week, most notably through the song, Stairway to Heaven. Nathan did not leave us a message when he left. He did not show any struggle or remorse, say goodbye or even hug us. All we know is that he changed out of his pajamas and then determinedly left us forever. What he did change into though was his Led Zeppelin Shirt, with its picture of an anguished angel, and allusion to the song Stairway to Heaven. God has truly, directly touched our hearts in leaving us this glorious message. Just as Jesus, hanging on the cross, cried out to God the words of Psalm 22, reminding us of the circumstances of his death on this earth. Nathan cried out to God too, leaving us with a poem of his anguish, turmoil, call to God for help and ultimate salvation. The song, the lyrics, the poem that it is, details it all for us. It clearly describes Nathan’s attempts to save himself from his depression, the humming obsessions in his head, and thoughts of misgiving. It explains the trees and whispering wind of my deceased father there at his death, guiding him to his stairway. His plea to God for help and cries for salvation are in that song too. And of course, the Piper/God there to reach out to him in his time of greatest sorrow, and delivering him to Heaven. God has spoken these words to us in black and white, clear as day, and as illuminous to us as when Paul first saw God on the road to Damascus. We too are in overwhelming awe of His glory, humbled by His blessings and eternally grateful for the peace and love He has shown us and given Nathan.
Nathan’s time on earth was one of contrasts. He was one of the happiest boys. He did not say much, but his huge smile could light up a room. He was overwhelmingly kind, gracious, and giving. He loved his friends, acquaintances, and especially his brother, Taber, and sister, Elle Louise. I know he positively influenced most of you here today. He was also in tremendous turmoil though. Nathan’s mind betrayed him and drove him to unimaginable sorrow and grief. We do not know, nor have been able to fathom the degree of his pain, but I think he suffered from it for some time, and unfortunately, always, tried to take care of it himself. This, of course, was not possible. We know he was blessed to have good friends, teammates, classmates, neighbors, mentors, and family all loving him back. We will always be grateful to you all for your love for him, and the happy moments you spent together. I’m sure you touched him as much as he did you. Even though our love was finite and ultimately could not save him, there should be no thoughts of guilt or regret for moments and opportunities lost. We all asked for a miracle this past week and hoped God would deliver Nathan back to us safely. But God works in mysterious ways and we can not understand his plan other than knowing that only He could save Nathan and ultimately He did that in Heaven.
It is clear to us from the outpouring of support over the last week that there is much love in this community. If Nathan’s death has any meaning to you please do not forget that. We are all loved, together in family, faith and friendship. Nathan’s initials were NWK and we’d like to that think that now this will remind you to live your life in love, amongst others, and “Never Without Kindness.” Of course, God’s love has shined through Nathan as well. Nathan’s is a story of sorrow, but also of amazing grace and eternal salvation. During your time here on earth, it is imperative for you all to recognize the love in those around you and in God for you. Let Nathan remind you to live life for those relationships and that love. Let your love grow with each tear for Nathan, and strengthen with time spent with others.
God bless you all, and let Him and Nathan look down on you with grace for all your life.