BHM: Sunday Morning Sex and a Cop w/ BEEF
AO: Big Hair Monday
When: 08/26/2024
QIC: Cindy
Number of Pax: 10
Pax Names: Cindy, Devin, Dibb, Dread, Kato, Pizza Boy, Rube, Slutzzz, TML,
The BackBlast:
Coming off a successful sabotage of the F3 Board Meeting “workout” at Swole on Friday, was curious what kind of trouble I could get the crew at BHM on Monday. I purposedly did a pre-blast so none of the lameos would show up and of course they didn’t (Scrooge, Mr. Bo, Calf Monster, Moonshine, Hillary, etc…). And no shit, we got in trouble…
The THANG (1 of the 67 dumb F3 names): Haul ass up East Blvd to the best fried chicken restaurant/gas station in Charlotte. Did some shit along the way. Then set our eyes on the newest monstrosity in SouthEnd to explore the new deck. Well that took about 10 seconds before a new rent-a-cop showed up with some BEEF to try and escort us out. We splintered at that point and left Dread to deal with the BEEF. We somehow escaped and made our way over to the Lowes deck with no issues. Of course we had to swing by and say Hi to our new friend and do some dips right in front of her office. What happened next is up for argument as Dread claims she came out and apologized without the BEEF. Nobody saw this though. We made our way back down East and was 3 minutes late. DAMMIT. Never be late as a Q.
Naked Man Moleskin (2 of the 67 dumb F3 names):
1. Highlight was obviously the security guard and her bodyguard who was dressed as a Stone Restoration construction worker. She actually thought we were going to listen to her. And trust me, we will be back.
2. Good to have Pizza Boy and Devin with us on loan from Caddy Shack. Still can’t believe Devin’s kids call him Devin when he is drunk (Thanks Dibb for that pro tip)
3. Sluttzzz reported back from the made-up F3 Board that they were very impressed with Metro’s attitude and love for everything F3.
4. Bricktops is NOT Brixx
5. Dibb was still in the honeymoon phase after the DNC last week. He thought the abortion truck was brilliant.
6. Slice got laid Sunday morning BEFORE church. Play on Playa.
7. TML got his quota of 3 words in but will still punch you in the face if he wants to.
8. Rube bought a Tesla but still can’t figure out the key yet so he can’t drive it. F150’s don’t have that problem. Just sayin.
9. I’m still awesome at writing BB’s.
Metro Natan Out
Still relevant! Even if not there!
BRR rulez!
Well done Cindy
This is excellent work Cindy, although you have minimized the amount of self-discipline it took me to resist blowing that ShoulderTalker and her Boy out. It was like all of my petty biases converged at once to frustrate me. The only thing missing was a CMS Union Rep wearing a face mask and carrying the book of the month from Principal Crawford’s Library of Shame. That might have tipped me over the edge tbh.
It’s a compliment at a Cindy-led workout to have interacted with him throughout the 45 minutes, tutored him with worldly knowledge and be left off the pax list.
I kinda miss Cindy after reading this BB.
Btw, I’m not lame.