First Backblast From Mars

The BackBlast:

I’m riding home yesterday and this chick calls me up. says she’s taking a survey, wants to ask me a bunch of questions. okay whatever, fire away. Its all about politics, “does this make you more likely to vote for this person” blah blah blah.

Then she says, “do you like Nancy Pelosi?” I’m like, “um…..hell no.” but then, I’m like, well wait a minute here…on the one hand, she’s got a huge freaking rack, but, on the other hand she’s crazy AF. Internally, I’m a bit frigg’n torn.

I tell you who I would freak’n vote for, Dennis Rodman. That’s right… O’l B Grinner sitting in a freaking russian prison. a RUSSIAN PRISON… and she’s like, “Y’all gonna send SEAL Team Six to bust me up outta here?” “How bout Joe Biden, could he make a call.” NOPE…we’re sending freaking D-Rod to handle the job. That’s some freaking diplomacy right there. I mean, homegirl did get 9 freaking years for some hashish. 9 freaking years. …bet all those jabronis re-thinking kneeling for the anthem now!

SIB: Whole Foods loop. I got lapped by Nash, twice. I GOT LAPPED TWICE!!! and where the F is everbody? “i’m not a runner.” Do you have freaking legs bro? just move them faster than walking.

Last thought: It’s becoming a “thing” to have sex in the nosebleeds at MLB games. This is freaking awesome. MLB has spent years trying to figure out how to make the game more appealing to fans (HEY- get ride of blackouts for crying out loud), and the fans have now taken it into their own hands…Go America.

Alright, time for me to get off the john and go delete some emails.

Gitmo. out.