Investment Opportunities
AO: CORE Meltdown
When: 01/14/2021
QIC: The Reverend Flo-Rida
Number of Pax: 14
Pax Names: Belk, Blue Toronado, Controller, DoReMi, Ernie, Foghorn, frostbite, HoeDown, Sunshine, The Nibbler, The Reverend FDlo-Rida, Van Winkle, Wally World, Wanda,
The BackBlast:
It hasn’t happened in a while but at one point in my life I routinely we get invited to parties and when I got there it wasn’t a party it was a multi-level marketing meeting where I was going to be pitched on how for the small investment of $1,000 and 100 hours a week I could become a Double Diamond distributor and reach my entrepreneurial dreams. I never liked this concept but man I fell for it again and again. So when it came time for me to plan the Beatdown I decided it might be a good idea for me to look for investors in a couple of my more creative– and I do mean creative– and yet lucrative business opportunities. It probably doesn’t surprise you to know that I constantly have in my mind a series of events that are both creative and lucrative and all I need is the right group investors to make these things happen.
And so I approached the workout at meltdown this morning as the leader who had several investment opportunities that he would present to the Pax. But before that happened we did the standard because even the greatest of investment opportunities start off with a standard. Following the standard I pitched them on the first opportunity. Basically this will be a Broadway musical of the children’s book Everybody Poops. I just don’t think this will be that hard to pull off and since I know so many many people that are just completely fascinated with those things that happened in the Colo rectal region.I am certain that it won’t take long for this to become a Tony award-winning musical. However none of the packs stepped up even at the Bronze level of $10,000.
So we moseyed on around the lake at Freedom Park over to the nature museum for the main event. When we arrived at the Nature Museum we did a stack starting off with Mak Taj Jeyes alternating swings Renegade Rose and side lunges. Stack it up then unstack it add 10 reps every timeand run a lap around the parking lot uphill in between segments. At which point it came time to inform the pax of my next Visionary idea
A spoof of Ken Burns documentaries. I want to make a mockumentary featuring Ben Kerns that will poke fun at all these people that do Civil War reenactments. I plan to feature a group of lgbtq folk that maintain the floral traditions from the Confederacy. I am just certain that SONS OF CONFEDERATE FLORISTS will be a fantastic and yet hysterical movie. Disappointed I was that once again none of the Pax jumped in at this meager investment opportunity of $5,000 each. And so we moseyed on to the band shelter where we did double protractors and oblique crunches when I was informed we were almost out of time
we moseyed on back to our starting point where upon arrival we had 60 seconds left so I called out for 10 burpees on your own. Just before the c o t I gave the Pax their last investment opportunity which will be a MTV “where are they now ” Type event featuring characters from Winnie the Pooh. My idea is to show all of the Winnie the Pooh characters as they would be now. For example Kanga is a radical feminist who owns a gluten-free bakery in Vermont and spends her time trying to reconnect with her son Roo who is an eco-terrorist stopping Timber companies in British Columbia. Winnie the Pooh has become a white supremacist /Alex Jones type who has an underground radio station in northern Michigan. Tigger has changed his name to Muhammad Al Kwanzaa and is now looking to create a Resurgence of the Black Panther Party. Christopher Robin is now Christina Robin– you can figure out the rest of that one on your own. Eeyore has been in and out of rehab for several years suffering from a bipolar disorder and hooked on antidepressants and heroin. The only normal one of the bunch is Piglet who owns the largest and most successful IHOP franchise in the United States. I think I almost had blue Toronado ready to write that check until I went into my whole bit where the crowd gets into a fight when Winnie the Pooh yells out Tigger Please.
Announcements : we are praying for double trouble as he is fighting a very serious instance of Covid. details on how to help coming later.
Blood drive 2.13.
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